today i woke up looking like this. i’ve been moaning about my curly hair, so i decided to cut it, and now i look like a boy. this is my first haircut since chemo. it was a little sad cutting off the hair that took forever to grow, but… it was bugging me. that last hair cut was a year ago this week! that’s progress i guess.
now i’m going to sleep. neil just woke up, which is a bad sign. it means either he’s up too early or i’m up too late.
this fast thing is sort of crappy. i’m not feeling very good and i wonder if it’s because i’m an idiot or i’m not 100% better from chemo or what. point is… my resolve is wavering and i’m not sure i am going to make it to friday. i’m definitely stopping by saturday so i can make myself ill whilst watching ufc 77. my will power’s cracking and it’s a pretty crummy feeling, but oh well.
of course now everything looks like food and it’s all around. i’m even thinking about eating a proper english fry up, though i also know that would be suicide. five live has been soliciting breakfast pics, and some of them are sort of gross, but this fry up makes me think about giving up this ascetic lifestyle for good. sad, innit?
i mean, look at it!
this morning i kicked off my day by going to the gym for the first time in about a year. the funny thing- i still have my same old locker that had my same old gym clothes in it. i’m not the same old kendra though- i’m 35 pounds heavier, more out of shape, lacking all upper body strength, and menopausal. it’s terrible. of course if i keep going to the gym, i’ll get better… but it’s tedious work and i don’t like all the kids i see there. i should go to bed to get up to spend half and hour on the stair climber (because i’m boring).
i stayed home from work today because i caught a nasty cold. i think if i were 100% better from chemo, it’d be merely an annoying cold, but no- this made me sleep all day and feel like a zombie. hopefully i won’t feel like ass in the morning so i can go to work tomorrow. getting colds- it’s just like before chemo. i blame all the work i did this weekend. i finished a group project and finished that 10 page paper. i’m now working on the three pager and a five pager. i can’t wait for this quarter to die for good.
tonight was big though- i officially went back to kalx. the only thing i really gave up for cancer was kalx. i missed it, even though i had lunch with kalx people a lot. i’m set to dj next wednesday, september 12, from 9:30-midnight. you all should listen. i also was elected to the prc (i ran unopposed). this is the third way i’ve been put on the prc- i’ve been appointed twice and then served as training director. the election was one of the nicest prc elections i’ve ever seen. nobody really asked me questions, nobody seemed to care about anything i had to say. i guess all the ballots had happy faces and words of encouragement on them. it was a unanimous vote too, which i’ve never seen in memory. usually there are a couple of noes or a couple of abstentions on principle. i guess nobody wanted to say no to a cancer survivor. ha! so yeah, i’m back in the saddle.
[tags]cold, sick, chemo, breast cancer, kalx, college radio[/tags]
i’m getting fuzz on my head! i’m almost ready for my tattoos!!!
robojoe and i had curry and chips for tea last night and it was lovely.
remember that eco-friendly website i made for class? now there’s a survey about it. please answer it! my group is really making me want to punch something and i could use the help.
there’s nothing really to add other than it’s been a week and i’m still sluggish and tired, but i think that’s more from my extreme bout of wii boxing last night.
i’m going to miss the nurses, but i really hope i don’t need to deal with them in a professional capacity again.
i think i’m almost ready to call myself a survivor.
the thing with the taxol is i feel ok thursday, fine friday, a little sicky on saturday, and completely dead sunday. i seriously though i had the flu or something. imagine being put into a tumble dryer for an hour on high. that’s how i felt yesterday. i also had to write an essay about netvibes. today i feel a bit better, but i’m still sore and achey all over and tired as hell. they’re sending me home from work right now because i guess i look that pathetic.
[tags]chemo, chemotherapy, breast cancer, taxol[/tags]
this was the first of my morning rounds of chemo. we had to be there at 8:30am! all told, the whole thing lasted over six hours. there aren’t many pictures of it because i was sleeping for most of it.
the reason it took so long is that the new drug, taxol, has a risk of allergic reaction. to play it safe, they start the iv drip extremely slow to minimize the reaction if it occurs. then they slowly speed it up, and i do mean slowly. they didn’t get to full speed till four hours into it. that was fine though. i meant to do reading for school, but all did was nap and watch some tv. it wasn’t so great. next time i’ll probably ready or maybe play sim city for the ds.
overall i like taxol a lot more than adriamycin. with the adria my urine was red for a day or two, and i felt sick. i never puked, but i always felt slightly ill and it smelled weird. taxol, i felt tired but ok for the most part. i was pretty functional the entire weekend, which was really nice for school.
next week should be interesting i guess. the treatment should be three-four hours this time. i hope my blood levels stay in the clear. my white blood cell count is less than half of what it normally is. i’m not in the danger zone, but it is a little worrisome to see that. i sort of forget that chemo is really destroying my blood.
[tags]chemotherapy, chemo, breast cancer[/tags]